Kymberlee Ruff here again. I
have studied many different therapy models in the past 35 years and I
say that Dr. Marshall Rosenbergs' approach to Peaceful Resolution
through Non Violent Communication is my favorite. I have been fortunate
enough to study with Dr. Rosenberg during the 25 years that he visited
Santa Barbara twice a year since the early eighties. Here is an
overview of his work.
Nonviolent Communication (abbreviated NVC, also called Compassionate
Communication or Collaborative Communication) is a communication
process developed by Marshall Rosenberg beginning in the 1960s. NVC
often functions as a conflict resolution process. It focuses on three
aspects of communication: self-empathy (defined as a deep and
compassionate awareness of one's own inner experience), empathy
(defined as listening to another with deep compassion), and honest
self-expression (defined as expressing oneself authentically in a way
that is likely to inspire compassion in others).
Showing that violence doesn't work
NVC is based on the idea that all human beings have the capacity for
compassion and only resort to violence or behavior that harms others
when they don't recognize more effective strategies for meeting
needs. Habits of thinking and speaking that lead to the use of
violence (psychological and physical) are learned through culture. NVC
theory supposes all human behavior stems from attempts to meet
universal human needs and that these needs are never in conflict.
Rather, conflict arises when strategies for meeting needs clash. NVC
proposes that if people can identify their needs, the needs of others,
and the feelings that surround these needs, harmony can be achieved.
While NVC is ostensibly taught as a process of communication designed
to improve compassionate connection to others, it has also been
interpreted as a spiritual practice, a set of values, a parenting
technique, an educational method and a worldview.
Kymberlee Ruff, MFT
1035a De la Vina St.
Santa Barbara, CA 93101
Phone: (805) 962-5564
Kymberlee Ruff, MFT © 2013